reflections

i sometimes wonder how my life would be different if my dad were still around... would his presence have been more of a stabilizing force? i miss him a lot, and i can't help but think things might have been better if i had someone to talk to about job choices, potential boyfriends, big life changes...

not that my mom isn't great, because she is. but we're so different, and we don't really understand each other...which makes it easier to just not really tell her anything than to have to answer all her questions and explain myself.

or maybe i just think my dad would have given me some boundaries, more direction... so i wouldn't have just quit my job and taken off to another country or moved to another state where i would have to start all over. maybe i just needed someone to say put his foot down and not put up with my b.s. rationale of having to experience my own mistakes to better learn.

what if? what if? what if?

new experiences...

well, i've been on the job for almost a month now, craziness! it's been kind of a steep learning curve, getting used to a new office, lots of different personalities, and doing a job that i haven't had a ton of experience with... still, i've been having fun so far and have really enjoyed knowing more about the film festival industry, getting to know austin better, and having more exposure to business development and corporate marketing/promotions as i seek out sponsorships from a variety of companies!

so what else has been going on?! sadly not much... i work quite a bit and now really really look forward to my weekends! i haven't been working long enough to be jaded yet, but getting up when it's still dark outside has definitely taken some getting used to!! that part hasn't been so fun... so try to take it easy when i have some time on my hands. still, work has helped my social life so can't complain too much... have a few events coming up that should be pretty cool: oscar party, a few receptions here and there, plus the opportunity to check out the competition at sxsw! i'm excited to experience it all, since i've heard so much about it, and i'm sad i'll be leaving in the middle of it to head back to nc...

highlight of the month has been sabina coming to visit, which was fun! it's always nice to connect with old friends and show them around austin since it's such a fun, low-key, chilled-out place. think she prefers the big cities, but at least we got to eat a lot of good tex-mex and bbq!!

so i'm basically staying put these days and dreaming about my next big trip whenever i make enough money to take off again!!

happy new year!

so it's been a little while since i updated this thing, mainly because i haven't had a picture to post with this new entry!! but figured i'd just broadcast what's been going on the past few months and then stick a picture in here whenever i get around to taking/finding one...

so for those of you i've horribly neglected over the fall (i'm so sorry!!), i actually took the plunge and moved to austin back in november, a few weeks before thanksgiving. i figured it was as good a place to be as any other, and since i seem to have a need for instability in my life, why not get used to a brand new place?! of course, i've been here quite a few times over the past two years, but it's still taking a little time to adjust to living in TEXAS, particularly given that i never thought i'd leave the east coast. how some things change....

since i've been here, i've been working on the job search and trying to focus on what direction i'd like my career (haha) to take... so far a sampling of jobs that interest me range from marketing and pr to event planning to research and advocacy...all of which means, in a nutshell, that i still don't know what i want to do. but it's okay, because at least i know WHERE i want to be for the moment, and austin is a fun place to figure out all these important life-changing issues. at least i won't lack for live music or a cool bar scene during my search!

in all seriousness though, if it hadn't been for the holidays and lots of people giving me pep talks every once in a while, i probably would've slid into mild depression, considering the number of resumes i've sent out compared to the responses i've received (like 100:1). job searching can be so frustrating and definitely takes a toll on the self-esteem. i'm hoping now that people are back at work from christmas and new year, hr responses will pick up and i'll be flooded with calls and emails for interviews!

in the meantime, i've been trying to keep myself busy in between looking for jobs: working part-time with mark and his dad at pioneer cycling tours and pioneer golf, volunteering at ten thousand villages (an awesome non-profit fair trade store with the mission to assist artisans in third world countries), and reading a lot (takes me back to my high school days!).

thanksgiving was a lot of fun, and mark's mom is a super cook who does amazing things with sweet potatoes, squash, stuffing, and turkey... i was fortunate enough to sample her dishes three times over the past two months!! christmas was very relaxing and peaceful, with mark's brother stephen making a trip back to austin from vietnam, and i got to meet him for the very first time on christmas eve! a few days later, my sister flew into town to hang out for a few days, which was really good for me, not being able to spend the holidays with my own family this year. she and i had a great time driving all over town (helped me figure out my way around better!), shopping, eating, and watching movies (although she usually fell asleep about 10 minutes into them). it was nice to be able to share my new life with her, and i'm so glad we got to spend some precious time together.... gets harder and harder the older we get, so i'm learning to appreciate these few moments we have!

as soon as gloria left, mark's cousins from england and scotland landed here, so we spent the week between christmas and new year's with them, touring around austin: texas state museum, zilker park, 6th street, ut campus, etc. and of course, they were here for the big national championship rose bowl game...which texas won!!!! was a very exciting week, beginning with new year's eve on 6th street and wrapping up with a historic national title for the longhorns! lots of bbq, beautiful warm weather, lounging about on lake austin, playing with the dogs, and just general relaxing before returning to the real world...what more could we ask for?!

so that's the news for now... i'll post some pics of my new place hopefully soon, so stay tuned... which reminds me, must get my camera fixed! here's wishing you all a happy and healthy 2006!

down time...

it's so anti-climactic... to have spent a year preparing for something, constantly talking about it and planning... and then when the time comes, time won't stop and before you know it, the wedding's over! feels so strange to not have to call my sister every day, asking about some little detail and making sure everything's on track (what time is the groom's cake being delivered to the restaurant? who's picking up the dove? is the soloist ready?!)...

i have to say, in my completely unbiased opinion, my sister's wedding was one of the classiest, most beautiful, and FUN weddings i've ever been to, complete with bar brawl at the end of the night! what could be more exciting than that?! seriously, it was a gorgeous day, perfect weather, short and sweet ceremony (not a dry eye in the house, not even mine!), delicious food (raw bar and chocolate dessert fountain), open bar, close family and friends... don't think she could've asked for anything better.

the weekend went by so quickly... started with mani/pedis for the bride and the bridesmaids, my first pedicure ever! for those of you who know how much i love my feet, my never having had a pedicure is pretty amazing! then it was off to the rehearsal at 4:30pm, followed by dinner at fortune palace for family and out-of-town guests. think we went to the airport every day last week to pick people up, flying in from all over the place! the 10-course chinese meal was fabulous, and the slideshow was definitely good for quite a few laughs, including at my expense (my sister insisted on putting in the most embarassing picture of me ever taken in my life). we finally got out of the restaurant near midnight and headed to downtown raleigh for some drinks, although most people -- including the bridal party -- turned in early because we had a big day ahead of us...

the wedding morning started out pretty leisurely... we ordered room service and sat around chatting, waiting for the hairdresser/makeup artist to get to the carolina inn. it was fun spending those last few hours with my sister and just cherishing that time together... don't know when we'll be hanging out just by ourselves again! once tracy got there to start doing our hair and makeup, it was pretty much non-stop for the next 6 hours... moms and aunts and cousins and friends running in and out, me speeding to the airport to pick up mark, the photographer snapping away... then all of a sudden all the guests have been seated and it's time to go downstairs!! being the unemotional person that i am, i didn't take along any tissues, although my mom and sister have already started tearing up...

let me just say right now, thank god for wedding coordinators because i'm not sure what we would've done without nancy! somehow she got us all down to the salon, handed us our bouquets, and readied us to walk down the aisle. it was very surreal, taking my place up front and realizing "wow, this is my sister's wedding..." and as soon as she came through the doors at the back of the courtyard, i couldn't help but start crying! apparently she had a hard time too and had to stop walking for almost a full minute in order to compose herself, during which time i got things under control too. the rest of the ceremony was a bit of a blur, between re-tying the flower girl's shoe and reading from elizabeth barrett browning and seeing familiar faces in the crowd and remembering my dad... lots of emotion and love in the air, of course!
the family!
after the formalities, time to party! the cocktail hour was in full swing by the time we finished up the photo session, and i parked myself in front of the raw seafood bar for shrimp, oysters, and mussels... yum! got to catch up with some old friends, people i hadn't seen in a long time, and got that long-awaited first drink too. after a little while, we were herded into the old well room for dinner and dancing, which lasted until midnight! in between, there was the first dance (scott and gloria danced to "when you say nothing at all" by allison krauss), the father-daughter/mother-son dance, the toasts, cake-cutting ceremony (after gloria changed into a gorgeous red chi pao), and song requests: gasolina, bon jovi, madonna, all the good stuff, plus some oldies for the parents!

all in all, i think most of the guests had a great time, and i couldn't have asked for a better way to celebrate my sister's marriage! she was definitely the belle of the ball, and i can't remember her ever being happier than she was on that day. and although it feels like scott's been part of the family for ages, it's nice to have him officially as my brother-in-law now. still getting used to the fact that my sister is married, but for now, better her than me!

wedding woes...

no, not mine! my sister's wedding is coming up on october 15, and although i love her dearly, all this wedding planning has been quite an undertaking!! from addressing invitations to reserving hotels to planning the bridal shower, plus all the little details like arranging favors, figuring out seating charts, and drafting the wedding program...it's enough for me never to want a wedding of my own!! i'm dead serious... have already warned my parents they need to get their fill with my sister and stepbrothers because if/when i finally decide to tie the knot, i'm taking off and eloping...

since i got back from dc last week (can't believe it's only been 7 days, need another vacation so badly!), it's been non-stop wedding, since we had to get the invitations out asap. the bridal shower is during labor day weekend, so that's the next project...with games to research, supplies to buy, menus to be decided...the list goes on and on!! at least everything seems to be coming together okay, what with flowers, music, invites, and clothing issues pretty much taken care of.

so i'm starting to get that restless feeling again, like i need to get out of here for a little while... but i guess i have plenty to keep me busy here, between job-searching and running around for my sister. looking for work has so far been somewhat half-hearted, since i'm still not sure where i want to go or what i want to do. i've applied to positions with consulting companies, educational programs, and random trade associations, some of which sound like really interesting places to work...but guess you never really know until you get there! i'll have to think long and hard if things pan out at any of these places, since i think the next move i make will most likely be semi-permanent, like maybe it's time to settle down?!

i'll keep you all updated as to what i figure out, when i get a clue...

back home!

so i'm back now...and although jetlag wasn't that big of a deal this time around, think i'm experiencing a strange sort of reverse culture shock, having spent the past three months in france. everything here is so much bigger than i remember, from refrigerators to cars to malls... and i swear i didn't know what to do with my left foot when i got into the car to go run errands my first day back! being more used to driving a stick-shift car now, i put my foot on the brake before starting the automatic and then thought, "i don't think i need to do that with this car..." very strange!

anyways, the last three months were a lot of fun but tons of hard work too... spent most of may and june living in a town called annecy, on the border of switzerland and a short drive from geneva. those two months were relaxing but busy, checking out the music festival in town, preparing for the upcoming tour, traveling to see other bike races, working on the new pioneer cycling tours website (www.pioneercyclingtours.com), and practicing my french!



beginning in july, mark and i started following the tour de france, heading up to the northwest of the country to see the team presentations and the first few stages, and spending a few days with some friends in chateaubriant. we then went back to annecy to pack up our apartment and get ready to pick up the 14 americans who signed up for our tour de france trip this year...

so from july 11-20, it was non-stop work, from constantly assembling/disassembling bikes, loading/unloading onto the rental vans, cleaning, topping off water bottles, interacting with hotel staff, making sure the clients were happy and healthy, camping out at viewing spots along the tour de france race route, buying groceries, setting up tents and tables, the list goes on and on!! think the other guides, mark, and i averaged about 4-5 hours of sleep per night, and i don't think i've ever done so much physical labor in such a short amount of time, ever! but despite a few unfortunate incidents, the trip went off beautifully and we received a lot of positive feedback from the guests. for our first year, think we did pretty darn well! there's always room for improvement though, and we learned a lot about the tour business in general, what to expect, how to better prepare...so hopefully next year will turn out even better!

after dropping everyone off in geneva or toulouse, mark and i continued on to paris to watch the finish on the champs-elysees, meeting up with some friends and cheering on the riders. although the day started out cold and wet, as soon as the riders entered paris and made their way up towards the arc de triomphe, the sun came out! we watched them circle the route from the arc to the place de la concorde seven or eight times, plenty of time to get some decent pictures. of course, lance ended up in yellow once again, and i guess it's nice for him to go out on a high note. i can't wait for next year though, and the opportunity to watch a REAL race, in which the cyclists actually battle it out, as opposed to one guy dominating the entire scene...

with the end of this year's tour de france, mark and i decided to go up to the northeast and scout out strasbourg and the alsace area, in advance of tour de france 2006, which is departing from strasbourg. we spent a few days in wine country, driving around vineyards and small towns with a decidedly german influence (architecture, food, language), booking hotels, learning about the area, and then went back to his aunt's place in the alps to pack up and get ready to come home!

i've now been in nc for a week now, just relaxing and running errands... it's nice to have a home to come back to, since my parents spend most of the year in hong kong, and i can have this place to myself. still, guess i now have to figure out what most of you are probably asking yourselves: what next?! i'm not really sure, although i have applied to some random consulting jobs here in north carolina and elsewhere. i've also sent my resume in to unesco's young professionals program in paris, so we'll see whether that pans out. otherwise, i'm just hanging out down here until my sister's wedding in october, helping her out with the wedding preparations. other than some side trips to d.c. and austin in the next few months, think i'm staying put for a little while!

homebound!

definitely won't be missing this place once i leave on sunday! the political situation has been pretty interesting, especially since it turns out it'll only be a one-candidate election and everyone knows the president's going to win again. still, there's not much of anything here, nothing to do really, and no one to hang out with....very unlike addis.

still, it is right on the water, and i have some fabulous pictures of the beach. actually spent the entire day today (friday is their only day off during the week) on this island off the coast of djibouti, and aside from the heat and having taken my malaria pill on zero food (don't recommend it as i got kind of sick), was very relaxing, and the water was soooo nice, very warm and super-clear. i've heard this area and up north (red sea) is beautiful for scuba-diving and snorkeling, so maybe that's their claim to fame here....



wrapping up my stay, none too soon, and will be back in dc on monday night, just in time for the ncaa championship game!! will be holding my breath this weekend for carolina to pull through the semis, should be a great final four! can't wait to get back to the states, will see you all soon....